More canyons

Did a speedy Empress canyon yesterday with Patrick and Trevor and a guy I don’t know called Callum. It is only 1.5hrs but it was really beautiful and really fun, lots of good sized jumps into cold water – but with my new wetsuit it wasn’t so cold . I was sitting in the middle of the canyon, about to do the abseil and staring out into the valleys of the trees. I felt so grateful be able to live here. It got a bit tentative for a little while there. I thought I might have to move back to the big smoke because the commute was getting frustrating – but something happened. And now I can stay here and live among the fresh air, the birds, the trees and the canyons.

It All Goes On

I had three days in a row at home this week. I haven’t had three day in a row at home for so long. It was really lovely, although it went pretty quickly. I had to do thesis work, but currenly that work is kind of relaxing. It doesn’t require running around and not being still. I got a good 3days before life gets hectic again. I have the feeling life is going to be hectic and hard this year. These are some Oscar Wilde quotes to get me through the year when it feels overwhelming and crazy and not still. 

1) Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast. (For when I don’t want to get up, or when I am hungover).

2) The basis of optimism is sheer terror. (For when I am scared but am required to be positive).

3) We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. (So we got to love the gutter and the stars).   

4) You can never be overdressed or overeducated. (For when I want to look fabulous or when I don’t want to study).

5) To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. (For when I want romance but lacking a partner).  

6) “With freedom, books, flowers, and the moon, who could not be happy?” (This speaks for itself)

7) “Those who find ugly meanings in beautiful things are corrupt without being charming. This is a fault. Those who find beautiful meanings in beautiful things are the cultivated. For these there is hope. They are the elect to whom beautiful things mean only Beauty. There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written, or badly written. That is all.” (Maybe sometimes we need to judge ourselves like the books, and not on some moral or immoral basis) 

8) “I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.”  (A bit of funny self-indulgence to get me through this journey, and my long train trips).  

9) It is what you read when you don’t have to that determines what you will be when you can’t help it.” (To remind myself it is wonderful to read for pleasure, as well as for work).

10) The heart was meant to be broken (Because others hurt us and we hurt them).

New house sitch

Our new house mate is great. I really like him in that platonic, he has a girlfriend and not my type but really fun and really great spirit kind of way. I was feeling a little bit strange about the whole thing of a stranger moving in and very early on he started placing his stuff all over the place. But he has sat and talked and been honest and encouraged honesty and read books and made jokes and laughed at mine (you know good sense of humour). I am getting a real good feeling that we as a house and a home are going to work. And he is doing a stint in Alice some time this year for work, so look at that. Maybe more of us will get to share is his good stuff.

Doors

So I was sitting on a train yesterday reading Hebrew and this man comes up to me and asks me if he can invade my personal space for a minute. Great question hey? So ofcourse I say yes, and as it turns out he is a lecturer at one of the major theological colleges in the city, and he was saying that he is often looking for people to tutor his undergraduate classes and to mark papers and stuff. I told him I very much doubt my Hebrew is up to scratch, but that I am a teacher of sorts, and maybe in a year’s time. I said the problem with Hebrew is it is a beautiful language but it is so hard. I have been noticing something about my Hebrew though. It does seem to be getting a little better (finally after 3 years of doing it). I find that the more I know the easier it gets to know more. Dses that make sense? It is like the pace of learning seems to be speeding up. Anyway, I thanked the man very much for saying hello and having a chat and he gave me his card. It was so random. I think God was trying to remind me that if I continue with it and work hard then a door will be opened. I may not even have to push that hard to get it opened.          

Ghetto Gospel

The ironic thing is I ended my last post with there is beauty in the world beyond the canyon. Can someone remind me again the beauty?? I guess when we walk close to the streets there are dark days. Actually probably you don’t need to walk near the streets for there to be dark but today I am hanging onto my Ghetto Gospel.

One of our vendors died today. Everyone asks me how did he died but the question is how did she die? I am pretty devasted. She sold out of the city so I knew her less than some of the others but I had experienced her light. She was on the single parents pension and sold the ”Issue” to cover all the extra costs. Not many women can handle the work but she’d created a world doing it, she had her regular customers who would stop for a chat and she’d come to the Vendor Cafe to connect with the Big Issue community – aahh it hurts. So sudden. Too young.  

And then one of my speakers is back laying his head on the streets tonight. Happy New Year. He used to live inside a Church in Rushcutters Bay, but they kicked him out today. A new minister with a grander vision of reclaiming back the Church. What fucking bullshit. My friend says to me “the thing about being homeless isn’t that you don’t have house, it’s that no one wants you.” And I am the biggest hypocrite of all. I want him to “wow” my students with fascinating stories of addiction and homelessness but it’s not ”wow” factor anymore. It’s just awful.But I don’t really want him living in my house. I refuse to be a role model. I got my own bottles. But anyway.

“Before we find world peace, we gotta find peace, in this war on the streets.My Ghetto Gospel. Those who wish to follow me, my Ghetto Gospel, I welcome with my hands and the red sun seems to last until the hills of gold, and peace to this young warrior without the sounds of guns.”   

 

 

See the canyons broken by cloud

Did Claustrel Canyon yesterday. It was amazing. I am pretty sore today though.

It was special to be in the middle of the earth, in its guts you might say. Looking up while floating in water and seeing the light shimmer down onto the rock. Can’t say I loved the abseil, but I made it this time with less swearing and stuff. There was some navigating to be done which I have to congratulate the others for. Keith and Pat made a pretty good team. I don’t really get how people read maps when there are no street names, but people do.

Anyway, we all had moments when we were aware of the power, the prescence and the beauty of our Creator. I call him God or Jesus or Elohim or Ha’shem. Anyways I don’t know really. All I know is there is so much beautiful and special out there, and I am deeply grateful when I get to encounter it. But beauty is not just in the canyons. It is everywhere.

 

  

Changing times

One of our flatmates moved out this week. He’s following a call of his, so one has to celebrate with him that. A friend of his is moving in this week.

I am going to miss him. We didn’t have the easiest journey – him and I. I dreamt for more between us. He didn’t. But I am very grateful for the time that I/we got to journey with him. He was very kind to me, even when I was frustrated, and he was always very hospitable to our guests and he was always bringing interesting people into our house to share meals and laughs with us. I still wonder of God’s ideas when he brought this man into my life - to be a somewhat embodiment of a dream I had that could never be realised. It wasn’t always easy but I/we are richer for all that he brought to our home. And a home we have all shared.

Now we look to the future. Our home is changing. But I am sure our new housemate will bring a new energy and new gifts. I like change despite the mourning that always comes with it. Change means that what was is no more, but that a new window has been opened.   

YAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY

I got the job and I am very happy. It is good pay and it is moving me a new direction (sort of). Actually maybe not a totally new direction. I probably have been heading in the teaching direction for a few years now, so yeah I don’t really know what I am saying. I’m just very excited. But in a way it is not exactly teaching – it is more facilitating spaces for students to develop their strengths and goals and purposes. I am so blessed and honoured to be given the opportunity to do this.  

The other great thing is it makes possible staying in the Mountains. I really love living in the mountains but was starting to think I might have to move back to Sydney because all the travel was not proving to be sustainable long-term. But now I can stay because some of the work will be Mountains based and in the West a bit. Actually I am really excited about doing some work in the west too. 

When I got the rejections from the other jobs I had applied for, I felt like God may have been trying to gently say there was something really good coming but I wasn’t sure and at points it all just seemed too hard and the competition too strong. But it has worked out and of all the jobs I went for this is the one that I absolutely want the most. Yes, it is a good day for me. 

 

feminism

Well I decided to go without the little joke in the cover letter. Thought maybe it better to play it safe.

So I started reading a book about the sexualisation of young girls. There is a story in the book about how when one of the Hi-5 women posed for Ralph in an effort to regain her womanhood, the author of the book made some comment that the Wiggles weren’t expected to prove their manhood by stripping off to their jocks and posing for a magazine shoot, yet woman were expected to take off most of their clothes to prove their womanhood. Anyway, people responded to her by calling her “sad, old and dog ugly,” and another person said she had “saagy breasts and droopy arse.”

This frustrates me a lot but I can’t quite articulate why. It’s got to do with the author is making a comment against the very discourse that tells women that to be a woman they have to be very beautiful and eye candy to men, and then a bunch of people comment on her breasts and arse. Aahh – I can’t believe it.

Is it appropriate to make a little joke in a job application?

I am going for another job. I am not going to say exactly what it is but I would love to get it. I have put one of the questions and some of my response to the question below. I make a little joke in it. Can you guys see the joke? Is it funny? (Me and Jem laughed a lot). Do you think it might help me stand out if I’m just a wee bit funny or is it a no thing to try and be funny in a job application? The job will require me to run workshops with young people. Isn’t it good to be a little bit funny when you do that? Anyway see below. If anyone has some really clear advice would be good.

Are you able to liaise and negotiate with a wide range of people effectively and sensitively?

In regards to negotiating sensitively there have been many examples at Rough Edges where I have been conscious of needing to tread very sensitively. I have been involved with the Rough Edges Community Café over a span of ten years and in the last two years I have been a team leader. The centre opens its doors to members of the Kings Cross street community who live with a variety of complex needs ranging from homelessness, mental illness and drug addiction. I have been required to deal with violent and many potentially violent situations with a non-violent communication approach. I have both attended and taught non-violent communication workshops.

However, at the extreme end of the spectrum, I work in close relationship with our Minister, the assistant minister and the counsellors at Rough Edges and when we have ideas and visions we are required to negotiate and liaise with the Parish Council and the Board.